Stealing from Wal-Mart Makes You a Target

Time for a break from soccer - on Monday night, the #2 Tennessee Lady Volunteers take on the #10 Duke Blue Devils (we, unlike the cutesy Lady Vols, don't need a diminutive form of our nickname to denote gender - we are all Blue Devils) in the never-friendly confines of Cameron Indoor Stadium. Cameron is sold out, and I will be among the Cameron Crazies welcoming Tennessee into our house the only way we know how - jumping and screaming the entire game. The Crazies are the best and most creative college basketball fans in the country, and the closest thing in America to the soccer hooligans abroad. We've earned a reputation over the years as the most creative have earned their reputation primarily at Men's basketball games, but we pack the house for the big Women's games, too.

Pat Summitt, the coach of the Lady Vols, knows how loud we are, and she's afraid that somebody's feelings are going to be hurt. She's threatening to pull the series with the Blue Devils if the fans aren't nicer to her players. Backstory - Alexis Hornbuckle, now a senior at Tennessee, was arrested for shoplifting from Walmart back when she was in highschool. Two years ago, when Tennessee last played in Cameron, the Crazies came equipped with WalMart shopping bags, and chanted "WAAAAAL-MAAAART" while she was at the free throw line. A little heckling to try and rattle the other team's point guard, and it worked - she went 0-4 from the free throw line, and then-#2 Duke beat then-#1 Tennessee handily, holding the Lady Vols to a season-low 53 points.

Duke has won the last three meetings and leads the all-time series 5-4... what does Pat Summitt think of the series?

"This series has been a great series," Summitt said, "but I was very disappointed the last time I was there with the behavior, in particular of the students toward Alexis. They stepped way over the line on that one. Hopefully we’ve moved on... I wouldn’t be in favor of continuing the series if we’re going to go in a gym and they’re going to take personal shots at one of our players... Why would you subject a student-athlete to that type of harassment?"

There are three important points here, and the first one is that making fun of somebody's high school shoplifting charge is certainly not "crossing the line." Last year, the week before the Duke men's team played BC, two of their players were kicked out of school for marijuana, and we certainly could have heckled them to death for that, but you didn't hear so much as a "WHERE'S SEAN" chant. For the last two years, the men's team has opened the season against our neighbors NC Central University (the stripper who filed the false rape accusations in a big court case you may or may not of heard of... she was an NCCU student), and we are always on our best behavior (screaming loud, but leaving out the stripper jokes). Some things are too serious. Shoplifting is not too serious. If you want a lesson in crossing the line, follow the Duke lacrosse team on the road. Especially to the University of Maryland, where class and tact go to die.

The second point is that as college students, these girls are adults and can handle themselves - they don't need Mama Pat looking out for them. That's a message that someone needs to pass along to Ms Summitt, who earlier this season benched Candice Parker for missing curfew before a game in her hometown. Parker, who was the first and so far only girl to win the slam dunk contest at the McDonalds High School All-American game (and is probably one of the top five women's basketball players in terms of name recognition because of that feat alone), had 60 friends and family members in attendance. Mama Pat is opposed to other people embarrassing her players, but has no problem doing it herself. We were teaching Alexis a lesson too, Pat - don't steal from WalMart! Set a good example for all the young girls watching you! You're a public figure now, being on a nationally-ranked basketball team - and that means that sportswriters, talk radio, and fans of both your team and the other team are going to talk about you. Get used to it.

The third point is that Pat Summitt would be making a huge mistake for her team and her school by canceling the Duke series. Earlier in the year, she made a similar stink with UConn and mysteriously canceled her series with the Huskies. Duke and UConn, of course, are two of the only schools with winning records against Pat Summitt, and she appears determined to find any excuse to not have to play these teams in the future. Say goodbye to your RPI and strength of schedule, Tennessee! And say goodbye to your recruits - for the best players in the country, the chance to prove themselves against the other best players in the country will outweigh the draw of the best coach in the nation. I'm not denying that she's a great coach (though it's never really noted that she inherited a 25-2 team back in '74...), but her recent antics have to make you wonder how much longer she'll be on top.

As a final note, you don't see any men's teams complaining about the Crazies not being nice to their players. Pat Summitt's complaint is one giant leap against Title IX. The girls can take it. Let them play. Way to go, Pat.